When a Monk calls your house after reading your blog and says to your husband, ” hey, does your wife’s head spin around? “
It would behoove you to make your weekly Prayer to God a good one…so here it goes:
Hi There God,
I was a pretty good person this week- you know I avoided those Express Way to Hell Sins…. Christ, I mean God….well, it was hard.
This woman who likes to run the pictures and workplace info of human rights activists that tick her off on the front page of her website was found guilty of shoplifting 3.18 worth of chocolate milk from a store.
I didn’t laugh.
I wanted to.
But I didn’t.
See, I did the compassion thing- which I know you’re big on- I hope you noticed.
I don’t know what I did to deserve this- but I’m going to be visiting this place at the end of the month:
I’ll do something Churchy when I get back. If you could swing it so that I see or meet some hardcore UFO people with cool stories to tell I’d be ever so grateful.
Now I have a question here God- I know you’re not big on explaining why you do what you do, but maybe you can help me figure out why people pull stunts like:
A few weeks ago a man missed the turn on my road and ran into my neighbors yard. He had two kids in his car and when some of my neighbors found out he was Mexican and so were the kids two of my neighbors- one who is an emergency room nurse and the other who prides herself on being a first aid expert and has one of those ice chest sized first aid kits in her truck wouldn’t go near the kids to make sure they were okay.
They were more concerned with trying to find out if the man was ” legal.”
I wonder, if I went to a real Church and made some of my friends and family go AND if I prayed more often could you make Intentional Gross Stupidity a Sin? Don’t say no too fast here- just think about it.
I have to confess something here God, I was at this resturaunt and this guy was rude- he was making fun of ” all the ugly girls here tonight”- so as he bit into his very expensive Pork Poor Boy Sandwich I turned to my husband and friends and said, ” do you know when a body burns in a fire it smells just like roast pork?”
They’re guys God, Guys who were into their third beer, they wanted to hear all about it.
Sandwich Jerk didn’t even ask for a bag for his untouched food when he left.
What else can I say besides
“snicker”
Oh wait
how’s about I just say
Amen
instead?
Okay….Amen it is and I’ll see you next Sunday.
Irregular Bones 
Oh no you did not put a picture of “The Exorcist’s” Linda Blair for me to see before hitting the hay.
You did not.
:::Trembling:::
I was scarred, scarred from that movie. Scared too.
Now I have to go get my rosary to protect me. jk.
I just saw Larry King interviewing some UFO experts and a skeptic. Was quite interesting. One of my favorite movies of ALL time is “Close Encounters of the Third Kind.”
I have a movie poster of it in my house. Also, I married a UFO freak who can find a UFO show on tv any time of day or night. Don’t know how he does it. My dad was like that with cowboy movies. Always had one on.
Oh Kitty,
I would NEVER have done that- the picture showed up all on it’s own 😉 REALLY
UFO people are the best story tellers in the world.
I just love the way they look at science and us- it’s great stuff.
Now, have a great Sunday and don’t let the bed bugs er….never mind.
Yeah, thanks, AM for the picture… I logged on as I was eating my breakfast. Dang, girl.
Regarding your neighbors, God is watching them. Stand far away.
Regarding, Ufo’s. Seen ’em. Don’t know if I believe in extraterrestrials. I think it’s government black ops, personally.
I really do think God has a soft spot for ya, AMM. He hasn’t zapped you yet. 🙂
Have a good Sunday.
PS: Did a monk really come to your door asking about your head? C’mon………….
Nope, he didn’t come to my door- he called.
He’s also one of my husband’s best friends and he actually LIKES what I write.
It was a joke, but darn it was a great one.
Actually God did zap a couple of my neighbors….but that’s for later.
And Like I told Kitty…the picture wasn’t MY doing.
it was probably this guy’s work:
amm
i left that out of the fart blog…
it, in fact, does spin around, but only when i rev it up a bit…
Sweet natured you?
I don’t believe it.
You wrote about quilts after all 🙂
“so as he bit into his very expensive Pork Poor Boy Sandwich I turned to my husband and friends and said, ‘do you know when a body burns in a fire it smells just like roast pork?'”
Well there now see there is a God.
Hi Max!
Yep and whoever is doing the God gig is a very forgiving one 🙂
It’s a guy named Ted…trust me on this.
I think i used to date the chick at the top of the post. I can’t really tell without her makeup.
Hey Criminy
I have to Pray once a week to a guy named Ted?
Welll…..being it’s my soul I guess I’m on board with that…
and the blue chick at the top of the post says ‘hi’.
Geeze, it IS a small world
anita
always has been. It’s smaller in Elk mound though. Let me know if the klepto gets elected
Criminy…Elk Mound or Bust!
I think I’m going to be in the area this fall, yeah, of all the places in the world I chose Elk Mound 🙂
And I will keep you up to date on the Klepto…she’s some piece of work isn’t she?
anita marie
yes she is. I went and read the story…pretty impressed with her own importance.
i’m going up this fall as well. My bi-decade visit
“RIGHTEOUS”
I want to be just like HER!!!!!!!!!
Aim high Tammy, aim high
anita marie