Sux Report

I.B. Sux To Be You Award Winner

/ Anita Marie / Leave a comment

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from

THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

SEATTLE — The Lynnwood deputy police chief accused of taking money that was being held as evidence has pleaded guilty to theft.

The U.S. attorney’s office in Seattle says Paul Christopher Watkins entered the plea Friday in an agreement with prosecutors. The 50-year-old Everett man faces up to 10 years in prison when he is sentenced Feb. 22 in federal court.

Prosecutors say Watkins stole between $70,000 and $120,000 in 2002-2005. The money had been seized in police investigations and should have been returned to owners or turned over to the city.

AND FURTHER INFO FROM

 KING5.com Staff

Lynnwood PD deputy chief pleads guilty to theft

SEATTLE – The deputy chief of Lynnwood Police pleaded guilty in federal court Friday to pocketing thousands of dollars that should have been seized during criminal investigations.Paul Christopher Watkins faces up to 10 years in prison and a $250,000 fine when he is sentenced next February.  The government plans to ask the judge to go beyond that range.

He’s the second highest ranking official in the Lynnwood Police Department.

According to the Department of Justice, Watkins admitted that he stole the money while serving as commander of the investigations division between July 2001 and March 2004.

Prosecutors say that money should have gone to the City of Lynnwood or back to its rightful owners.  They plan to argue at sentencing that Watkins stole between $70,000 and $120,000.

Prosecutors say they are concerned Watkins destroyed records about the thefts just hours before a search warrant was issued.

On the night before the raid, FBI agents saw Watkins walk out of his south Everett home with garbage bags full of shredded documents.

“That night they observed him leaving his house carrying large garbage bags,” said Mark Bartlett, Assistant U.S. Attorney.  “They watched him go to various public dumpsters in Lynnwood and dumping this shredded material into dumpsters.”

If I Only Had A Brain

/ Anita Marie / 3 Comments

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this is an I.B PSA

I like to look at my Stat page- they have this section where you can see what word combos have led readers to your blog or website.

I’ve noticed something …. and it’s played my last nerve.

This is a note to those people who 

!!!DON’T USE SPELL CHECK!!!!

This is how you spell “Immigrant “

It’s not spelled “IMMAGRANT”

Geeze.

This was an I.B. PSA

Put Your Hands Up and Step Away From The Jack-O-Lantern

/ Anita Marie / 11 Comments

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Okay God,

I know it’s Sunday, I know it’s time for God Chat but this is serious God and being that you’re in charge of everything I expect that you will have an interest in this.

Yeah, Yeah- I know it’s Saturday but tough it’s Sunday somewhere PLUS Halloween is just days away so we have to settle this NOW.

First of all

I know Global Warming is bad…it’s a sin and the irony that Earth will end up looking like Hell for what we’re doing to it is not lost on me.

but God…God Damn…A Green Halloween?

Healthy snacks? Experience Nature? Linen and dinnerware from The Pottery Barn?

This isn’t  Halloween- this is the way they celebrate Halloween at an Old Folks Home-and guess what- most of the old people I KNOW would be laughing so hard at this lame idea that  they’d wet their Depends.

And then to make it worse…this Green Halloween group wants a sugar free Halloween…good thing one of the “leaders” has a site you can go to so that you can buy stuff ( impress me…give it away )

Which brings me to this.

Lizzie Borden

Today I read about this Lizzie Borden Halloween Prop that costs THOUSANDS of dollars.

She swings an Ax up and down.

When I was a kid this family had a Haunted House set up in their basement and the Dad used to dress up like Lizzie and chase people around with an ax and he’d be screaming ” Forty Wacks! Forty Wacks for you all! “

and we’d be screaming for Jesus and our Moms.

God, it was pretty darn great and I’ll bet the entire thing didn’t cost thousands of dollars.

and the results?

Priceless.

So God, do us a favor.

Show these Heathens the light.

Halloween is all about life and death

It’s all about celebrating the things we can touch and feel and taste and smell.

It’s about not being afraid of the dark and the things that hide there.

It’s about having one night where you don’t have to whistle

as you walk by a cemetery- you can perform a full on Aria.

On this one night you don’t have to be afraid of things that go bump in the night because you can BECOME that thing that goes bump in the night

For just one night.

That is not asking for to much, is it God?

So I’ll see you Halloween Night- I’ll be the one with the mask on

( har har )

and

ahhhmeeennnnn

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The 2007 SUX Award Goes To….

/ Anita Marie / 2 Comments

The producers of ‘Desperate Housewives’ and ABC Studios 

Come on down you little racists you and accept your award on behalf of members of the Hitler Youth everywhere.

The I.B Award Winning episode showed actress Teri Hatcher, who plays Susan Mayer, asking during a medical consultation to check “those diplomas because I want to make sure that they’re not from some med school in the Philippines.”

By taking a stand and declaring that Medical Workers from the Philippines are inferior, – your voice- which resonates in homes all across the United States, will insure that Americans  will be safe from the hands of individuals who come to our country and provide important services to our

sick

our poor

our tired

and our huddled masses.

Good Job

and we know you probably have a rally to attend in a field somewhere so grab your white hoods at the door and keep up the SUX  work that you do so well

The I.B. Staff

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I.B Tells Kucinich Fans To Go SUX Themselves.

/ Anita Marie / Leave a comment

THIS IS AN I.B. SPECIAL SUX REPORT 

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I know this person who considers herself to be the ” Progressive Movement ” made flesh.

She protests against the War, ” Cooperate Personhood ” and Voting Machines. She weeps copious tears everytime we start talking about ” women’s issues ” and she has also told me that she thinks that the ” Progressives ” need to focus on getting Kucinich elected President and that I have to stop practicing ” Identity Politics ” and ” support something that’s good for ALL OF US.”

That means I have to pretend to be white so that she can pretend that race isn’t an issue in Politics, in our Community or anywhere on the Planet Earth.

All I can say is-

She can go SUX it.

This was Today’s I.B. SUX Report

Why Do Stupid People Have Tongues?

/ Anita Marie / 11 Comments

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Hi.

The I.B. Manager ( that’s Anita ) is in her backyard playing kickball with Jesus.

At least that’s what I think she’s doing…I mean, she’s kicking a basketball against the side of her house and mumbling, ” Jesus Christ ” over and over again- so I’m going to do a ” Sux Report ” because she’s not paying attention to her writing at the moment.

Okay here it goes:

When a latte liberal tells you she’s been on ” Diversity things…you know like committees since the 60’s and NONE of them ever worked so what’s the point in helping THOSE PEOPLE when it’s obvious they’re just not into it”

AND the Latte Liberal is white and she’s imparting this opinion to about five people who are NOT white

You can’t help but to wonder why Stupid People Have Tongues

because everytime they open their mouths to talk

you realize

 that SUXS.

Wow That SUX!

/ Anita Marie / 9 Comments

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this is an I.B. Special

SUX TO BE YOU REPORT

 

When I was in the fourth grade I laughed at a kid who tripped in the lunch line.

My teacher decided to make an example out of me and I had to write on the blackboard 500 times

” I will not laugh at the misfortune of others. “

I learned my lesson….and I ignored Darren ( who I blamed for the ‘blackboard incident ) until one day he and his  Mom show up at my front door and Darren is all emotional and hurt because

” Anita won’t talk to me anymore and I don’t know why “

Over 30 years later and I still have to pay attention to Darren.

But that’s another story.

Today I laughed at the misfortune of another person…and I laughed so much I’ll be standing at that blackboard until the Flying Monkeys come home….

go on read this true story and you’ll see why.

The owner of the Psychic Experiences shop says she had a feeling something bad was about to happen to the signs outside her store. Monday night, an arsonist set fire to signs that said “Tarot card reading — $20” and “Open.”

Police said they have no suspects. Evans said she doesn’t, either.

i will not laugh at the misfortunes of others…

but this time I think I will

Sorry Mr Olson- you Blackboard Fascist