You’re testing me God…I know you are. Like you want to see how fair and compassionate and forgiving and all Churchy with my fellow human beings I’ve been.

I’ll confess straight up.

I’m going to lose, but what the Hell…you gotta forgive me for blowing it because it’s in the rules. Okay, I didn’t learn the rules in Sunday School, I googled  them.

So there.

Hey as an FYI is Googling The Bible A Sin?

Oh, at this stage of them game who cares.

Let’s get started, shall we?

 

Dear God

This week was chock-full-o nuts and I managed to crunch into every single one on the tooth that I chipped back in 1985 when that drunk lady hit my car.

First up you threw the racists right at me as I was cruising down the highway of life.

 So you ask did I forgive and move on?

Well…come on you know I didn’t.

There was this Anti-Mexican Group that protested in Seattle because they think that Mexico wants to invade the United States and Canada and that from there they plan on taking over the world.

Of course there was a Counter Protest and in the course of events-

Beer Cans and Water Balloons were thrown by Counter Protestors.

I don’t know which set me off the water balloons or beer cans.

Like were the balloons full of beer

or not?

Just curious.

I mean either or, the result was very chuckleicious.

And then of course I must’ve taken your name in vain about a million times in ten seconds after hearing that  this bridge here in Washington collapsed as a flatbed truck carrying an excavator drove across it.

I know it was like a sign from you. But the thing is I’m not sure what the sign meant.

I’m willing to chalk that one up to one of those God Mysteries and walk away from it.

And I know how amused you are by the local stuff from the County I live in otherwise weird stuff like this wouldn’t keep happening:

Like there was a LONNGGGG newspaper story about what it’s like to work in McDonalds.

Here it is in short form:

In the Service Industry you get treated like a Servant.

That sucks.

End of story.

They must pay per word at the Herald.

Mountlake Terrace made it into Wikipedia. You did that right? I mean, who the Hell else would pull a stunt like that? Oh wait….yeah that figures.

So there it is God, at every turn I had a chance to float above it all and make you proud. Instead, I sprayed Pam on the my sled and shot my way straight down every single slope you put me on top of.

It was darn fine ride.

At any rate I want to see how you top this week.

You have your work cut out for you, but I guess you know that.

So that’s it for now

See you next Sunday and…… 

Amen