Max found this.
Okay Everybody say ‘thanks’ to Max for finding
the best Zombie Character ever created….
and that includes those lame ones
and
Those
dorky Zombies
in
The Return Of The Living Dead Movies.
Joke
How Evil Am I?
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YOU ARE 14% EVIL !!!!DARN!!!! |
An I.B. Screaming- I mean Screening
The Management…that’s Anita
wants this to go out as
a
PSA
the guys who normally do the PSA’s
are hiding.
They’ll pay for that.
Count on it.
Anyway…
She says this is art
and fine film making
and needs to be shared with the world.
Kill Me God.
Now.
My Last Words
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Your Famous Last Words Will Be: |
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An I.B. PSA
There’s a difference between Women and Ladies
and how they deal with life.
Here are a few examples:
LADIES –
If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it’s still cooking drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant quick fix.
REAL WOMEN –
If you over-salt a dish while you are cooking; that’s too damn bad. Please recite with me, The Real Women’s motto: “I made it: So you will bloody well eat it and I don’t care how bad it tastes”.
************************************************
LADIES –
Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.
REAL WOMEN –
Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink. You might still have the headache, but who gives cares?
**************************************************
LADIES –
Stuff a miniature marshmallow at the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.
REAL WOMEN –
Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete’s sake. You are probably lying on your arse on the couch, with your feet up anyway.
**************************************************
LADIES –
To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.
REAL WOMEN –
Buy boxed mashed potato mix and you don’t have to worry about the potatoes growing arms and legs.
**************************************************
LADIES –
When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won’t be any white mess on the inside of the cake.
REAL WOMEN –
Go to the bakery they’ll even decorate the pain in the neck for you.
**********************************************
LADIES –
Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.
REAL WOMEN –
Sara Lee frozen bloody pie directions do not include brushing egg whites, so I don’t do it.
***********************************************
LADIES –
If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes opening jars easy.
REAL WOMEN –
Go ask the very HOT sexy guy who has just moved on next door to do it.
************************************************
And finally the most important tip….
LADIES –
Don’t throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.
REAL WOMEN –
Leftover wine??
Hello ???
this psa was brought to you by
the I.B Staff
and The Doll Guy With The Big Knife
Sunday I.B. PSA
Okay…this is an emergency I.B. PSA
That means that the I.B. Managment found something REALLY IMPORTANT that the public needs to be informed about-
she also thinks that Flying Monkeys, PEZ and this movie called ” Bubba Ho-Tep are REALLY REALLY IMPORTANT too so keep that in mind when you pop over and see how the 10 Commandments have been Criminized.
Don’t ask…just click THIS
and remember…I just work here.
The Bumbo Collection
It’s A Joke!
jokes don’t have to be gross
to be considered
sick….
Two men dressed in Pilots’ uniforms walk up the aisle of the plane.
Both are wearing dark glasses, one is using a guide dog, and the other is tapping his way along the aisle with a cane.
Nervous laughter spreads through the cabin, but the men enter the cockpit, the door closes, and the engines start up.
The passengers begin glancing nervously around, searching for some sign that this is just a little practical joke. None is forthcoming
The plane moves faster and faster down the runway and the people sitting in the window seats realize they’re heading straight for the water at the edge of the airport.
As it begins to look as though the plane will plough into the water,
panicked screams fill the cabin.
Just at that moment, the plane lifts smoothly into the air. The passengers relax and laugh a little sheepishly, and soon all retreat into their magazines, secure in the knowledge that the plane is in good hands.
…… In the cockpit, one of the blind pilots turns to the other and says,
“You know, Bob, one of these days, they’re gonna scream too late
and we’re all gonna die.”
brought to you by the I.B. Staff
under duress from the
Management
Irregular Bones 