Plus You Get Pizza

December 8, 2007December 8, 2007 / Anita Marie / 1 Comment

sometimes I find stuff on the net that i just have to share with the world

these are a few of those things

enjoy!

FBI Agents Ordering Pizza
The following is a direct quote from the Center for Strategic and International Studies report on GLOBAL ORGANIZED CRIME; the author who introduces the story swears it’s true.

FBI agents conducted a raid of a psychiatric hospital in San Diego that was under investigation for medical insurance fraud. After hours of reviewing thousands of medical records, the dozens of agents had worked up quite an appetite. The agent in charge of the investigation called a nearby pizza parlor with delivery service to order a quick dinner for his colleagues.

The following telephone conversation took place and was recorded by the FBI because they were taping all conversations at the hospital.

Agent:

Hello. I would like to order 19 large pizzas and 67 cans of soda.

Pizza Man:

And where would you like them delivered?

Agent:

We’re over at the psychiatric hospital.

PM:

The psychiatric hospital?

Agent:

That’s right. I’m an FBI agent.

PM:

You’re an FBI agent?

Agent:

That’s correct. Just about everybody here is.

PM:

And you’re at the psychiatric hospital?

Agent:

That’s correct. And make sure you don’t go through the front doors. We have them locked. You will have to go around to the back to the service entrance to deliver the pizzas.

PM:

And you say you’re all FBI agents?

Agent:

That’s right. How soon can you have them here?

PM:

And everyone at the psychiatric hospital is an FBI agent?

Agent:

That’s right. We’ve been here all day and we’re starving.

PM:

How are you going to pay for all of this?

Agent:

I have my checkbook right here.

PM:

And you’re all FBI agents?

Agent:

That’s right. Everyone here is an FBI agent. Can you remember to bring the pizzas and sodas to the service entrance in the rear? We have the front doors locked.

Pizza Man:

I don’t think so.

Click.

Thank You Baby Jesus

December 7, 2007December 7, 2007 / Anita Marie / 2 Comments

It was a rough commute to work this morning- road rage people are worse on Fridays because there aren’t as many people for them to attempt to kill on the weekends I guess.

So what could cheer me up after almost being murdered in a crosswalk by a Lexus?

I got to work and found out Kangaroo Farts could save the world.

Thank You Baby Jesus- I needed the laugh.

Chuck A Sickie

December 5, 2007December 5, 2007 / Anita Marie / 13 Comments

Hi Everybody!

This is stuff I learned while I waited to see if the storm that hit Washington State would make my toilet overflow…

First of all here some pictures of some flooding from around Mountlake Terrace, Washington…I didn’t take them- I pulled them from HERE

They look dramatic but I should say these shots are in ‘hollows’ and that the areas shown aren’t huge…but if it’s your car or apartment pictured here then it probably feels like your entire world is under water.

We didn’t get any flooding near my house- unless you count the ‘accidents’ three of my cats had because they refused to go outside to use the bathroom during the storm(s).

Well two of them had accidents-

Meet Blitzer

( he’s the third cat )

Blitzer drank water non-stop

ON PURPOSE…don’t ask me how I know, I just do.

I also learned this great expression ( as I worried about my plumbing )

To chuck a sickie:

It’s a saying they use in Australia.

It means to take a day off sick from work when you are fine.

My goal is to use this phrase at least once a day for a week. I’ll let you know how it goes.

According to my post rankings ( which briefly distacted me from my Sewer Fears ) I learned that my readers- pictured below-

( oh come on…where’s your sense of humor? )

are into Alcohol, Exorcisms and Bruce Campbell…though some of you seem to be flirting with David Tennant ( traitors! )

and here’s what I learned about Politics ( which brought me straight back to thinking about my toilet ) : This Louis Black On Homeland Security… 🙂 He says it’s all about duct tape and Electro Shock Therapy. I did NOT know that.

I’ll be darned.

Warning…nasty words alert- careful where you play this!

So that was what I learned…and thanks for asking- no my toilet did not overflow.

YAY!

It’s Haka Time

December 4, 2007December 8, 2007 / Anita Marie / 3 Comments

A haka is a traditional dance form of the Māori of New Zealand. It is a posture dance with shouted accompaniment, performed by a group

okay, okay…here’s the read deal…enjoy!

Check Under It’s Tail

December 2, 2007 / Anita Marie / 3 Comments

My Grandfather was from Canada

He told me he used to ride a dogsled to school.

He lied.

I wish I’d seen this post at Max’s years ago- it would have explained a lot. And I still wouldn’t be smarting over the fact no one really rides a dog sled to school.

They don’t do they?

Return Of The Evil Kitteh

December 1, 2007 / Anita Marie / Leave a comment

moar funny pictures

TEQUILA COOKIES

November 30, 2007November 30, 2007 / Anita Marie / 14 Comments

OR

how I survive the holidays

1 cup of dark brown sugar
1 cup (2 sticks) butter
1 cup of granulated sugar
4 large eggs
2 cups of dried fruit, such as dried cranberries or raisins
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
1 tsp fresh lemon juice
1 cup coarsely chopped walnuts or pecans
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequila (silver or gold, as desired)

Sample the Cuervo to check quality.

Take a large bowl, check the Cuervo again, to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.

Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point it’s best to make sure the Cuervo is still OK, try another cup just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Pick the frigging fruit off floor.

Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a drewscriver.

Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity.

Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Check the Jose Cuervo.

Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find.

Grease the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don’t forget to beat off the turner.

Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Cose Juervo and make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.

I Am SO Forgiven

November 25, 2007November 25, 2007 / Anita Marie / Leave a comment

Hi God

You know when we have these chats I get mail and comments and the gist of it is ” blah, blah, sacrilege that blah, blah you’re gonna fry and my favorite: ” gee Anita if you keep this up God will be so busy tossing lightening bolts at you that the rest of us will be in the clear.

Keep Up The Good ( har har ) work.”

I am now one of the saved: Thanks God Inc Guy.

episode 1