Christmas Secret

::::A Christmas Secret::::

When I was a kid, one time at Christmas I licked all of the powdered sugar off of my Aunt’s homemade  Bourbon Balls and apparently none of her guests noticed because they ate them anyway.

I had nightmares about that for years.

::::A Christmas Video::::

 ::::A Christmas Idea::::

It involves PEZ, Voodoo and rubber bands- I’ll let you know how it goes

No. Way.

I would have never imagined putting these words into the same sentence.

Billy Idol sang a Christmas Song. “

But he did, and it was cool

Enjoy

For The Non-Mallers

If you are like me

you have learned to avoid Shopping Malls during the Christmas Season .

It’s not easy to be a Non-Maller,

 after all misery loves company and she has an entire family

who wants to see her happily involved in a relationship.

:::So enjoy your treat, you’ve earned it:::

funny pictures of cats with captions
see more Lolcats and funny pictures

icecream
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Oh boy! I gots a  hoomin for Christmas!
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Sometimes You Just Do It To Yourself

santa-cookies

I’m not a hard person to shop for at Christmas- I don’t care about stuff, I just like opening the packages and being surprised.

Which means that I’m really hard to shop for because people think that I won’t say what I want…and when I do give it up and say what I want those same people think I’m kidding so these are the things that I have asked for and have never, ever received and probably never will.

Knives.

knives

I wanted a set of those fancy knives that all good Cooks have in their kitchens.
I’m actually a great cook and I’d have to be because I use one knife and it’s never been sharpened. So really I can work miracles in the kitchen.

In case you’re curious

I will probably never get a set of knives from anyone I know because  I write about people getting their heads chopped off… A LOT…oh and I was a Mortician.

And I have a temper.

Next:

I have asked and asked and ASKED again for a

Fiji Mermaid.

mermaid

Yes  I AM  serious.

I think they’re cool.

And after 35+ years of asking I haven’t  seen  a Monkey /Fish toy, model, picture or keychain under my Christmas tree.

I suppose I will never get a Fiji Mermaid because- geeze I don’t know, I guess it’s because when I’ve been asked, ” Are you serious? ” I just roll my eyes around and walk off.

Something with Two Heads.

punx

Actually what I wanted was a Pickled Punk.

I wanted something in a jar that I could name Bixy or Lil’  Chunkles and all I know is that after years of  begging I have an empty shelf in my room with no Jar…oh wait I do have one full of fake eyes that float in water but that doesn’t count because I bought it for myself.

I can’t explain the Pickled Punk no show under the tree situation. I guess there’s no way anybody in my family is going to go to a store and asked for something dead in a jar to give to someone at Christmas…even if that someone is me.

Well.

I can’t fault my nearest and dearest for not twisting Santa’s otherwise open and giving hand to give me the present of my dreams-

 I did it to myself.

I just ask for weird stuff.

So.

This year I’m going traditional.

This year I’m asking for something old fashioned.

red20cedar

Okay.

Fingers crossed everyone

and

Merry Christmas!

cold-cat

 

 

AdvenTURE Calendars at Soul Food

 

There is a tradition at the Soul Food Cafe. Each December, for the past five years, Heather Blakey has launched an Advent Calendar on the first day of December. Advent calendars have long helped build excitement and anticipation on the countdown to Christmas, typically revealing a pretty picture or piece of chocolate behind the cardboard door for each December day along the way. Heather Blakey adopted a new approach to this tradition. Each day during December a new link lights up on the Soul Food Advent Calendar.

The Cafe now has a collection of these beautiful features, kept for posterity and full of prompts and inspiration for eager writers and artists. This lens features all of them.

So check it out HERE and enjoy!

christmas-bells

Presents…Presents For You ALL!

The Radio Museum
Photo From: The Radio Museum

Here is a link to a site called

Web-Radio Christmas Stations

My Favorite Station  Is

Christmas New Orleans Style…

( Oh Kitty….are you there? )

I just heard a version of the 12 Days of Christmas where somebody’s true love gave them a voodoo doll.

Here’s the youtube clip- you guys just HAVE to hear this song:

Told you.

It’s Great.

Have fun with the other stations too.

a.m.

30 And Counting

It’s 30 and Counting so here are a few little things to help you get into the Spirit of  the holiday season

and

no it does not involve exorcisms or dead people or ghosts.

WOW.


You guys are MORBID.

a_winters_night

NORAD TRACKS SANTA

HERE

If you want to do something non-computer related

you could bake a

Red Velvet Cake

2 1/2 cups flour
1 1/2 cups sugar
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp cocoa powder
1 cup buttermilk
1 cup oil
1 tsp vinegar
2 eggs
1 1-oz. bottle red food coloring
1 tsp vanilla
Icing:
1 stick (1/2 cup) butter
1 1-lb. box powdered sugar
2 8-oz. packages cream cheese
1/2 tsp vanilla
1 cup chopped pecans

Sift together dry ingredients. Add other ingredients in order: buttermilk, oil, vinegar, eggs, food coloring, and vanilla. Mix thoroughly. Bake in Bundt cake pan which has been greased and floured about 50 minutes (or until toothpick comes out clean) at 350 degrees. Cream Cheese Frosting: Let butter and cream cheese soften at room temperature. Cream well. Add sugar and beat until creamy. Add vanilla and blend well. Frost cake after it has cooled and sprinkle 1 cups chopped pecans on cake after it has been frosted.

Or you can buy it from Swiss Colony  In The U.S.

swisscolonyredvelvet

Link is

HERE

So there are a few bits and pieces to get you in the Spirit- or make you cry like a baby because the holidays stress you out.

Oh… cheer up, it’ll be Easter before you know it.

 

 

WHEN IN ROME DON’T DO WHAT THE ROMANS DO UNLESS YOU’RE A ROMAN

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Yesterday my family were sitting around the old Christmas Tree, eating the Candy, finishing off the turkey and telling stories  with Christmas Music playing in the background- all that was missing was Tiny Tim asking God to Bless us all.

But that old fashioned Christmas feeling was sort of shot to the North Pole on a Yule Log because at least four of my family members were sending text messages to their friends.

I choose my victim- which thank you Baby Jesus was my little Brother-and I start giving him a hard time about being a slave to his Phone and he says how he’s just starting to get the hang of this text messaging thing so he has to practice.

It’s like learning another language, he tells me, and if you don’t practice you could really embarrass yourself like he did a few months ago

when….

” You know what happened when I started this text thing Cheeto La Frito? ( that’s his nickname for me)  I couldn’t get those letters right. It was weird I’d get these letters all strung together that made no sense so I wouldn’t answer. I even took my phone back because I thought something was wrong with it.”

” Anyway, I was dating this girl and we were supposed to meet for dinner and I’m at the restaurant when she sends me this text message that her Grandmother had died.

Well, I couldn’t think of anything to write back so I just sent her my love. “

” And….”

” Well, I thought I’d use the new lingo and typed in my love. “

” Uh-huh.”

” Lots of it.”

” I should hope so.” I told him.

” So I texted back LOL.”

 

OMG.

I hope your Christmas was just as fun(nny)

amm