Author: Anita Marie

Dear NASA

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Dear NASA

So NASA thanks for sending the one Space Shuttle you allocated to the West Coast to L.A.

 Not that I am pleased you passed over Washington state … but you did manage to piss of  some Texas politicians in the process which no matter how you look at is always good for a laugh.

Texas seems to feel your decision was Political and I would have to agree with that. On the other hand, California doesn’t want to secede from the Union and if Texas ever actually does that  they would have to give the Shuttle back to the lawful owner, which is of course the United States of America.

So I still love you NASA but sending us that stupid  full fuselage trainer, which is a full-scale mockup of the space shuttle, minus the wings ( seriously…no WINGS? ) made us feel like we were going to the Prom with our cousin because we couldn’t get a real date.

That sucks sweetheart, it really does.

So just promise me that if you guys find a UFO and Space Aliens that you don’t send the Aliens to Arizona because they’ll just put them on a bus and send them to Mexico and don’t, for the love of God send the UFO to my home state because it will get turned into a drive through espresso stand where the baristas will probably wear nothing but tinfoil and a smile.

Till then, stay precious.

Love From

Anita’s Irregular Bones 

How Did I Ever Get Along With Only Five?

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When I was a kid one of the first stories I learned to tell was the one about the infamous ” Bloody Finger “

Its about this lady that can hear a voice from outside and its saying:

“I have the bloody finger…I have the bloody finger.”

Finally at the end of story, this old lady is mad with fear, she’s hiding in her dark living room with an axe- she gets up from behind this couch where she has been hiding the entire time when door swings open and standing there is this kid with a cut finger and he says

” I have a bloody finger…Hey Lady…you got a band-aid? “

Of course in my version she chops his head off and screams  ” fix that with a band-aid you monster! “

I know… that is a weird story and what follows his another weird story about fingers. Enjoy. And count yourself lucky I didn’t find anything that ties into the one I heard about the Ten Legged Booger Monster.

Sixfinger

Sixfinger

Sixfinger

Do You Know What Time It Is?

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I don’t want books to go away-even if they are replaced by little computers you can carry around with no effort and will fit anywhere.

My fear is if books, real books, go away so will the writers.

Point: Have you noticed if a movie isn’t a retread it’s based on a computer game and ‘reality shows’ are based on another reality show  that came out a month ago?

And in some cases if you see a movie trailer you’ve seen the movie?

Before e-mail became all the rage I had Pen Pals and I wrote letters. Some of those letters took days to write in some cases. Now I send comments on facebook and most of my e-mails are less than a hundred words because I’ve been told- who has the time to read a letter?

Writers are not being replaced, we are becoming obsolete.

I figure that one day you’ll just jam something into your ear and a voice at the other end will tell you what to see and  think and …oh wait…

The year 2000 as it was imagined back in 1910 by Villemard

Its Just You And Me Rod Serling

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So this is where I have been for the past month and where I will be for the months to come:

I’ve started taking  screenwriting classes.

I’ve never actually read a script, I haven’t put much thought into what it takes to make a movie or a tv show and last year after helping on my husband’s campaign I was ready to jam a pencil into my own ear if I ever was tempted to sit in front of a computer and write anything for any reason ever again.

So this screenwriting class almost didn’t happen.

But the fact is I love to write and I love to tell stories so I signed up and off I went.

It was all good until it dawned on me that I was in a class with people who knew what they were talking about, they understood the industry and they had favorite screenwriters.

I have Rod Serling. And I tossed his name out there when we were talking about screenwriters we admired.

So at that point it was me and Rod sitting in this class- and had it been in the real world and not on -line I could picture us in the back of the class face palming ourselves when I hauled off and threw his name after someone dropped the name  Alan Ball and I had to google ASAP to find out who he was.

He turned out to be a very big deal.

Geeze.

But you know, that’s okay because, well, because it was funny I guess- and if  I am in a situation even the awful ones and I can laugh I know I am in the right place and that I am going to be okay…better then okay in fact.

So for the past month I read scripts, I’m studying from a book called the Screen Writer’s Bible I did my homework and when I handed in my assignments I learned that I was not a complete chucklehead with the creator of the Twilight Zone as her inspiration to become a writer and her guide into a completely new area  of writing that was completely alien to her.

However, if you are going to stand on a bridge look down into the abyss say to yourself, ” Oh yeah, let’s do it ” that kind of enthusiasm for adventure and the excitement for turning a corner and finding yourself in a strange world doesn’t come  our of thin air.

It comes from the Twilight Zone.

amm

Where I am taking my classes:

Academy of Film Writing

Info

HERE

hey how about a 3 way ackward pause?

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Matt Smith

like the Doctor’s Bow Ties

is

cool:

and this is the story of

Doctor Who

as told by puppets, dancers and Craig Ferguson