Guess what I haven’t done yet?

That’s right.

I still haven’t started my Christmas shopping yet.

I’m going to wait until the last minute so that the stress makes me light-headed and the Mojitos I intended to throw back will hit me like a freight train running out of control down the side of mountain that is collapsing because it’s just been hit by one of those ginormous asteroids that killed off the dinosaurs.

Ho Ho Ho

and

Merry Christmas