Get’cher Sanity Here

 

I was going to write about something serious, something meaningful something that would demonstrate that I’m paying attention to the world around me.

So I vowed:

No silly posts about food or boogers or how NASA should put me in charge of naming asteroids and planets because I’m good at that sort of thing. No joke posts or stories about my friends who call me up and demand I post stuff about David Tennant and no snarky stories that I write about my other friends who want me to stop writing about David Tennant ( killjoys- good think I like you or nobody else probably would ) .

And today I absoulutely refused to do a story about decomposing bodies or the things we get buried with that don’t decompose just because I think stories like that are just super funny.

But then I sneezed and  heard this popping sound in my ears and my head cleared

and Sanity returned.

Man.

That was close.

Now.

Here’s some artwork for you to enjoy:

hamsternator

Mental Health Monday

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Today I was standing around talking with some friends who work with the public and they pointed out that they don’t think people do crazy things when the moon is full- like the legends say.

They think people act crazier when it rains.

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What did I think one of them asked-

and I said

-well, it’s  was starting to rain so let’s see how it goes-

and then seemingly from nowhere I asked them  if they knew

breast implants don’t really decompose and knowing that, you’ve got to  wonder how many moldering corpses have perky breasts.

Boy.

 I hope it keeps raining because I have a lot more where that one came from.

she20devila.m.

You Lil’ Vixen You

 Remember  back in the day when Music Videos were all about video vixens with big hair rolling all over the hoods of sports cars?

We’ve come along way since then.

Meet

Mr. David Tennant

I don’t know what the acting thing holds for him

but he’d make one heck of a great Video Vixen.

a.m.

onstage

Comic Relief: Franz Ferdinand performing their newest single ‘No You Girls’. David Tennant gives them a little bit of help. Donate and help fight poverty at Donate to Comic Relief at http://www.bbc.co.uk/rednoseday/

tie1

 

Goodbye Mom, Goodbye Pop-Murder By Greed

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Politics aside, real people are being affected by the economy- I don’t care what you may think of President Obama or that Chuckle- Head Bush-. Ronnie Ray’s song is a snapshot of what we are all are facing out there. 

And high time we hear those stories because there are precious few of them out being told… the Media and even Bloggers who I read and thought would be all over the story about Americans in distress don’t seem to go there- I wonder why?

So thank you again Ronnie Ray for stepping forward

… and hey Ronnie Ray !

What was it like to talk to CNN?

from Ronnie Ray’s intro on Youtube:

I wrote this song today with all that’s going on, and as we all watch a part of Americana die. This is my take on it all. Murder by Greed

Play This Loud

I used to think this song was pretty neat.

And then I heard this version and I  knew then that it was the most amazing song EVER-

MISFITS

It Was The Write Thing For Me

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A few of my friends who write for Political Blogs asked me if I’d like to do some stories  for their sites- personally I think that what  they’re actually  asking is for me to get my husband to do the stories but you know, whatever…

Once- out of curiosity – I asked if they had actually ever read what I’ve written because I can’t imagine why a person who does political analysis would ask someone ( like me for example ) who does David Tennant stories (every darn chance I get -oh wait, mostly I do them for the pictures…never mind  those don’t count as stories- not even to me ) and stories about Space Boogers and cops getting into high speed chases with stolen donut trucks… to write for them.

So I sent links to some of my favorite stories ( and I use that word loosely ) over and I get this call that in part goes like this:

‘Do you ever do any serious stories?’

and I said

” Sure. When I want to see my stats treading water in a toilet bowl I do serious stories. In fact sometimes I flush them straight down The Porcelain God on purpose. That way  I  have an excuse for running David Tennant posts and Dancing Fruit clips for days on end. I  But look, I can’t play with my readers. A few times I’ve done a series of serious posts and I had to resort to writing about singing waffles and exploding pigeons to get them to come back. And let me tell you, that just about did me in. Do you know how hard it is to find sources about singing waffles? 

Just as an FYI- if you never, ever want to be invited to participate in any kind of  forum  to take part in a serious Political  discussion with sober people- make sure you mention David Tennant, toilets,exploding pigeons and singing waffles in the conversation.

It  worked for me.

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Music To My Ears

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It’s something I never really thought about-

What are

My 10 Favorite Sounds.

I’ve gone ahead and listed them, and do you know what? It turned out to be harder to do then I thought it would be because I’ve discovered that  I love sounds a little less then Pez and a whole lot more then French Fries.

But I put some effort into it and managed to complete the task and hear  ( ha, ha,- get it? )

they are

Growling Dogs

Screaming Cats

Breaking Glass

People singing out of tune

The bzzzz sound that electrical fixtures make when they are shorting out

Scottish and Italian Accents ( I grouped those together because I think all accents are pretty wonderful sounding- those two are just a little more wonderful then most )

Water going down a drain

Clacking and snapping Typewriter Keys ( remember those? ) manual or electric- it doesn’t matter

Creaking doors

Sneezing- especially if  boogers are involved.

……hmmmm…..

I should do smells next

or maybe list of my 10 favorite bones

choices, choices, choices

which will I chose next?

 

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Guerillas In My Midst

There’s this woman

I see at least twice a week on my way to lunch and she walks up and down main street

in her fashionable Spring coat, with her her giant handbag  swinging from her shoulder and I swear to God when I see her walking by I want to jump on the hood of a car and start singing the lyrics from

The Mary Tyler Moore Show at the tops of my lungs..

She just has that air about her.

About a week ago she goes cruising by when I see her stop at a stop sign and she walks around it, reaches up and pats it and then she does the same  thing to a street sign and then one of those construction barracades signs and even a Pay and Park Station.

A few days later she walks by and does the same thing- so I’m curious. I go around to the back of the Stop sign I see there are these little tiny kangaroo stickers stuck to the bottom of the sign – there’s dozens of them some are new and some have obviously been there for awhile.

The same for the Pay Station those freaky little stickers are everywhere and if you didn’t know to look you wouldn’t really notice them.

So I’m talking to friend of mine and I start telling him about the Nutty Lady and the Kangaroo stickers.

” She’ not nuts, she’s one of those Guerilla Artists.”

And then I learned that Guerilla Artists are all about making statements with their  art and then I guess detaching themselves from them.

” So she’s saying she likes Kangaroos and then walking away from like-what? Making a statement about liking Kangaroos? That’s pretty cold hearted. I like Wolves, but I wouldn’t stick tiny little Wolf stickers on the backs of signs, I’d stick them on the front. And they’d be big. Not fingernail sized things, that’s for sure. “

My friend looks like if he ever hears about Kangaroos again he’s going to stab himself in the ear with pen just to spare himself the grief.

So I drop it.

For now.

So for days I’m wondering if maybe I should say ” Hi ” to the Kangaroo Lady with the expensive handbag – you know in way of showing my appreciation for her artistic endeavors.

And sure enough I get my chance when I pass her on the street at lunch time as usual. 

She does the sticker thing and as she’s walks away this Homeless Guy from the shelter up the street says to me, ” last time I defaced public property they tossed my sorry ass in jail.”

” It’s a fact, ” I tell  him ” life is not fair and the Justice system is the least fair of all.”

” That’s God’s truth, my Sister, God’s own truth.”

I don’t know who you are Kangaroo Sticker Chick, but if you are an artist you it may interest you to know that on Main Street one of your fans is a guy who pees in public and a woman who isn’t afraid to talk to a guy who pees in public.

We are better then nothing I suppose. 

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Say What?

shhh

Every once and awhile I get some hater leaving a comment on my blog about how my blog sucks or how the pictures suck or how I should just drop dead and and rot  because I suck at writing.

You know.

 One has to wonder-

if it’s attention the ‘ you suck ‘ people want they should probably go and get it from a blog where the comments aren’t moderated.

Because that’s what I do.

I moderate them right off the face of the Earth, leaving the ” Suck-ee ” tribe to wander the face of the Unloved and most important of all

Unread.

But not un-laughed at…

I can always spare some room around the Bones for that..

exorcist003