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On the twelfth day of Christmas, 
my true love sent to me 
Twelve drummers drumming, 
Eleven pipers piping, 
Ten lords a-leaping, 
Nine ladies dancing, 
Eight maids a-milking, 
Seven swans a-swimming, 
Six geese a-laying, 
Five golden rings, 
Four calling birds, 
Three French hens, 
Two turtle doves, 
And a partridge in a pear tree! 

For serveral years I believed my family Christmas Gatherings on the whole were trauma and drama free- or so I thought until I decided to write my own version of ” The Twelve Days of Christmas”.

And then I started to remember things like the time I went on a bike ride in the snow covered with Chicken Pox. And how on another  Christmas I convinced my little Sister ( let’s see she was about five at the time)  we found her floating in Greenlake in a basket just like Baby Moses and how if Santa found out he was probably going to take her presents to her real house so she shouldn’t count on getting anything at MY family’s house that Christmas.

Oh and there that Christmas Eve I hid all of my brother’s socks and underwear- we were older at the time – like 19 and 18 or something. But watching him toss a hissy fit over a bunch of lost underwear was worth all the threats of bodily harm my Mom was threatening to do to me if I didn’t give his stuff back right now That Christmas Eve is one of my most precious memories.

No it did not send him into counseling- at least I don’t think so.

And of course there was that time when I was about 13 when my dog Sham -who was this giant Malamute snatched the turkey off the counter where it was cooling and after I got it back from him me and my brother and sister had to put it back together because we tore it almost in half when we pulled it out of Sham’s jaws.

Talk about team work- not only did get that thing put back together we did it without our parents knowing- which of course probably isn’t the case at all but what the hey- it was probably the quietest the three of us had been since our Christmas Vacation from school had started a week before.

My parents were into ‘be grateful for small blessings’ mindset. 

Let’s see- oh sure, there was that other time I took all of the chocolate covered cherries and drained the juice out of them- and for the rest of the night everyone complained about ‘that box of defective Cherry Cordials’ and how only OUR family could be unlucky enough to get it.

That box of candy still represents our family as the Underdog Champs of the world.

And then there was that year me and my brothers and sister and cousins performed a concert for our families.

We stood on the stairs just like the kids in the Brady Bunch and song meaningful heartfelt songs like Working On A Chain Gang, Teen Angel and my own personal favorite Goodnight Irene.

That ‘ concert and the songs were my idea- and if there was ever a Kodak moment in the history of photography the look on all of those faces as they watched us sing by the glow of the Christmas Tree was one of them.

So honest- there wasn’t a lot of trauma or drama and looking back on it you could have done worse then us – given how many of us there were and how all of us were so different from each other ( okay and the rest of the human race ) all of these things could have been the stuff of holiday disasters.

But they weren’t.

We always had a good time and I’ll bet that after reading this a few people will be awfully glad they’ve got the families they have.

So.

We All Win.

Merry Christmas