Day: October 28, 2007

Put Your Hands Up and Step Away From The Jack-O-Lantern

/ Anita Marie / 11 Comments

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Okay God,

I know it’s Sunday, I know it’s time for God Chat but this is serious God and being that you’re in charge of everything I expect that you will have an interest in this.

Yeah, Yeah- I know it’s Saturday but tough it’s Sunday somewhere PLUS Halloween is just days away so we have to settle this NOW.

First of all

I know Global Warming is bad…it’s a sin and the irony that Earth will end up looking like Hell for what we’re doing to it is not lost on me.

but God…God Damn…A Green Halloween?

Healthy snacks? Experience Nature? Linen and dinnerware from The Pottery Barn?

This isn’t  Halloween- this is the way they celebrate Halloween at an Old Folks Home-and guess what- most of the old people I KNOW would be laughing so hard at this lame idea that  they’d wet their Depends.

And then to make it worse…this Green Halloween group wants a sugar free Halloween…good thing one of the “leaders” has a site you can go to so that you can buy stuff ( impress me…give it away )

Which brings me to this.

Lizzie Borden

Today I read about this Lizzie Borden Halloween Prop that costs THOUSANDS of dollars.

She swings an Ax up and down.

When I was a kid this family had a Haunted House set up in their basement and the Dad used to dress up like Lizzie and chase people around with an ax and he’d be screaming ” Forty Wacks! Forty Wacks for you all! “

and we’d be screaming for Jesus and our Moms.

God, it was pretty darn great and I’ll bet the entire thing didn’t cost thousands of dollars.

and the results?

Priceless.

So God, do us a favor.

Show these Heathens the light.

Halloween is all about life and death

It’s all about celebrating the things we can touch and feel and taste and smell.

It’s about not being afraid of the dark and the things that hide there.

It’s about having one night where you don’t have to whistle

as you walk by a cemetery- you can perform a full on Aria.

On this one night you don’t have to be afraid of things that go bump in the night because you can BECOME that thing that goes bump in the night

For just one night.

That is not asking for to much, is it God?

So I’ll see you Halloween Night- I’ll be the one with the mask on

( har har )

and

ahhhmeeennnnn

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In A Little Town North Of Seattle

/ Anita Marie / Leave a comment

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I tried to explain to the guy on the bus that Lynnwood is all about shopping malls and Ford Explorers and Soccer Moms and Hockey Dads.

But he wasn’t having it.

He said Lynnwood is all about Power and Corruption and Crooked Cops and dames with big hair and blue eye shadow.

What’s this Coffee Swillin’ chump know I thought to myself?

He’s from Seattle and as far as he knows there’s nothing North of Seattle except for the Wilds of Canada and Lumber Jacks named Swede and one- eyed grizzly bears with attitude problems.

Coffee Boy smiled wished me well and got off at his stop

And then I saw this story staring up at me from the paper he left behind and I thought to myself

He may be right…. 

I.B.

WE GOT UPDATES HERE!

FBI seizes handgun, cash in Lynnwood police investigation

By Christine Clarridge

Seattle Times staff reporter

The FBI has seized a handgun that was reported missing from the Lynnwood Police Department’s evidence room as well as cash during a search this week of the home of a deputy chief under investigation for theft, according to court documents.

A search-warrant return filed in U.S. District Court on Thursday says FBI agents seized money, a .38-caliber revolver, financial records, shredded documents, police paperwork and pipes, powder and a scale from the Everett home of Deputy Chief Paul Watkins.

The serial numbers on the revolver match those of a handgun that was among evidence checked out from Snohomish County Prosecutor’s Office by Watkins in 2002, according to the FBI. The evidence package also contained more than $14,000 cash and two grams of cocaine, the search warrant application alleges.

The amount of cash seized from Watkins’ home is not included on the search-warrant return, which is an accounting of items taken during the search.

The search warrant alleges that Watkins told the Police Department’s evidence officers that he would release the money to its rightful owners, but no paperwork tracking the money was ever completed and no receipts were found.

The evidence had been originally seized by Lynnwood police during a 1996 drug bust, the search warrant alleges.

Watkins, 50, has been placed on paid administrative leave. Evidence against the longtime Lynnwood officer is now being presented to a grand jury, according to a source. No criminal charges have been filed.

Watkins could not be reached for comment. The Lynnwood Police Department has declined to comment.

According to court documents, Watkins served as the department’s commander of the Investigations Division from 2001 to 2004 where he oversaw property seized from criminal suspects. During that period, Watkins flouted department policy by having officers turn over directly to him cash that had been seized by police and was due to be returned to its original owners, the search warrant alleges.

When asked about the missing package in May, Watkins said he recalled bringing the package of cash, handguns and cocaine from the prosecutor’s office to the evidence room at the department, but said he failed to log it in properly.

The search warrant also details six additional instances between 2001 and 2005 in which Watkins allegedly kept seized cash that he was supposed to return to its owners.

According to the search warrant, the FBI was asked by Lynnwood police to investigate Watkins after an internal audit showed that cash released to him between 2001 and 2005 could not be accounted for.

The search warrant also says that Watkins and his wife have filed for bankruptcy four times in recent years and that on several occasions Watkins made cash deposits to his bank account on the same days that he claimed to have returned seized funds.